Taking Sexy Back
How to Own Your Sexuality and Create the Relationships You Want
Your journey toward pleasure, empowerment, and connection.
You'll discover how to deepen your sexual self-awareness and use that awareness to quite the outside noise and create pleasurable experiences that expand and heal you.
CONNECT WITH YOURSELFYou'll learn to understand your boundaries, communicate what feels good, and bring mindfulness and self-compassion to sex in order to embrace your sexuality as an evolving, essential, and beautiful part of your life
HONOR YOUR DESIRESYou'll shift from performance to enjoyment, from shame to comfort, from numb to enlivened. Sex is about more than just what your partner enjoys—it's about you. It's time to take your sexy back.
CULTIVATE INTIMACYWHY I WROTE TAKING SEXY BACKFlipping the script from “sexualized” to “sexual.”
As women, we’re expected to be sexy, but not sexual. We’re bombarded with conflicting, shame-inducing, and disempowering messages about sex, instead of being encouraged to connect with our true sexual selves. Sexy gets reduced to a performance, leaving us with little to no space to reckon with the complexities of sexuality. In a culture intent on telling you who and how to be, standing in your truth is revolutionary.
This book is about reclamation — taking back that which is your birthright as a woman and as a person.
As a professor and relationship therapist for over twenty-five years, I've worked with countless women and long-term couples for whom sex is a tremendously fraught topic. While a commitment to sexual self-awareness doesn't guarantee a lifetime of carefree sex, it will help you address painful or problematic aspects of your sexual story with courage, curiosity, and compassion.
“In a world that profits from our disconnection from ourselves, owning our sexuality is truly revolutionary.”
A glimpse at what’s inside
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Discover how cultural narratives have shaped your sexuality—and learn to create your own definition of sexy from the inside out. It's time to quiet the noise and reclaim what has always been yours.
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This exploration of sex as physical shows you how to make peace with your body and discover that ending the war with your body unlocks more pleasurable and present sexual experiences.
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This exploration of sex as emotional teaches you to honor all of what sex stirs in you—the uncomfortable feelings alongside the pleasurable ones—and discover that your feelings are data, turning you away from experiences that create disconnection and toward ones that fuel authenticity, intimacy, and healing.
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Navigate the challenges and possibilities for love and sex in the era of choice. By reflecting on the complexities of modern love—dating apps, pornography, shifting expectations regarding marriage— you create a sense of internal anchoring that helps you chart a course that feels aligned and true for you.
HERE'S WHAT FOLKS ARE SAYINGBUY NOWTaking Sexy Back
It is time for a new sexual revolution. It’s time to take sexy back! Order Taking Sexy Back from your preferred retailer.
Readers Guide
BONUS RESOURCES
This guide is meant to give you space to work through, laugh about, and bemoan all of the thoughts, feelings, and revelations you have had while reading this book. Grab a couple of friends and remember to be gentle to yourself!
FEATURED TALKLoving Bravely: Creating and Maintaining Intimacy in a Long-Term Relationship
Dr. Alexandra is a dynamic speaker who is known for her ability to invite her audiences to explore the complexities of relationships with curiosity and compassion. In her Loving Bravely featured talk, Dr. Alexandra helps your audience explore how emotional and sexual intimacy relate to one another, and she offers tools and perspectives to help you stay connected to yourself and your spouse.
Related Resources
Continue building your Relational Self-Awareness with these resources from Dr. Alexandra and her Loving Bravely newsletter, with fresh insights and practical guidance that expand on the lessons in the book.
Take the quiz to get a personalized Truth + Dare to help you practice loving bravely.
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WHY DO WE ALWAYS END UP FIGHTING ON FAMILY VACATION?Three conversations to help you protect your relationship and plan for how you’ll stay close in the chaos.
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