From Disconnected to Passionate: How to Get Out of a Sexual Rut with Dr. Kate Balestrieri
Conversations about sex are so important, but approaching the topic with a partner can feel overwhelming. When we come up against sexual challenges in our relationships, it can be easy to fall into patterns of blame and shame. Listening to this episode is a great first step as you find your voice and reclaim your power in your sex life. You’ll hear from psychologist and sex therapist Dr. Kate Balestrieri, who joins Dr. Alexandra for a conversation about sexuality and her new book, What Happened to My Sex Life? They explore the importance of creating shared agreements and visions with your partner when it comes to sex, how to navigate retroactive jealousy, and the role safety plays in our sexual connections. They also respond to a listener question about how someone’s sexual history can impact their current relationship dynamic.
Relevant links:
Dr. Kate’s book: What Happened to My Sex Life? A Sex Therapist's Guide to Reclaiming Lost Desire, Connection, and Pleasure
Dr. Kate’s Instagram: @drkatebalestrieri
Dr. Kate’s website: Modern Intimacy
Get Naked with Dr. Kate (podcast)
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Bedroom Conversations: Why Great Sex Starts With Great Communication with Vanessa & Xander Marin
On today’s episode of Reimagining Love, Vanessa & Xander Marin join Dr. Alexandra for a frank and compassionate conversation about sex—specifically, sex in long-term relationships. It’s normal for couples to fall into a rut in the bedroom, ranging from sex feeling kind of “meh,” to long periods without any intimacy at all. These ebbs and flows are part of being in a long-term relationship or marriage, and the good news is, there are actions you can take to chart a new course with your partner and to get excited about each other again. Vanessa and Xander are a couple who have been creating that very roadmap for folks, through their amazing online courses, their podcast, Pillow Talks, and their New York Times-bestselling book, Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life. Vanessa is a sex therapist with 20 years of experience who has been featured in outlets like O, The Oprah Magazine, Harper’s Bazaar, Vogue, and Goop, and she has written for The New York Times, Allure, and Lifehacker. And Xander? Well, he is a “regular dude” who left his corporate job to join Vanessa in this work. Together they blend clinical wisdom, humor, openness, and their own personal stories to normalize talking about our sex lives and to offer techniques for improving yours. You are going to hear about their personal experience with couple therapy and how they landed on the agreement, “If it matters to one of us, it matters to both of us.” They share so many juicy insights about sex, from desire discrepancy to initiation to their amazing acronym “P.L.E.A.S.E.,” which you’ll learn in this conversation. This episode will give you the confidence to shift the way you and your partner talk about sex and couple therapy, as well as anything else you might be stuck on.
Relevant Links:
Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life by Vanessa & Xander Marin
Vanessa & Xander’s website: https://vmtherapy.com/https://vmtherapy.com/
Vanessa & Xander’s courses & challenges: https://vmtherapy.com/holiday-gift-guide-2024
Vanessa & Xander’s podcast, Pillow Talks: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/pillow-talks/id1569466131
Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day
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Give the gift of Relational Self-Awareness! All of Dr. Alexandra's online offerings are 20% off until December 20th, 2024! They include the hallmark course "Intimate Relationships 101" and the Reimagining Love Workbook as a beautiful companion to this podcast. Visit https://dralexandrasolomon.com/giftguide2024/ to explore Relational Self-Awareness as you and your loved ones move into the new year.