Why Self-Compassion is an Essential Practice with Dr. Kristin Neff
Dr. Alexandra’s conversation with Dr. Kristin Neff is all about self-compassion, an essential tool for your emotional well-being toolkit (and that’s scientifically proven!). Dr. Kristen Neff, a trailblazer in the field of self-compassion research, introduces the three foundational pillars of self-compassion, illustrating how integrating all three of these elements empowers individuals to confront their inner critic and cultivate healthier connections.
The discussion delves into the biological and family of origin influences that shape our self-criticism, while also addressing the grief that may surface when embarking on a self-compassion journey. You will also learn about Fierce Self-Compassion, and how we can lean into this action-oriented facet to be ambitious and to fulfill our life’s purpose.
You’ll come away from this episode with:
- A deeper understanding of the three pillars of self-compassion and their impact on relationships.
- Insights into how practising self-compassion can cultivate self-love, foster connection, enhance intimacy, and reduce anxiety, shame, and isolation.
- A new perspective on some common myths of self-compassion, such as:
- Are self-compassion and self-esteem the same thing?
- Is “self-compassion” just “self-pity” rebranded?
- Does practising self-compassion encourage people to not take personal accountability?
- Does embracing self-compassion mean we can’t be ambitious or want to come in first place?
- Strategies for integrating self-compassion into your routine, with a simple starting point that Dr. Kristin Neff herself practises daily.
Resources worth mentioning from the episode:
- Learn more about Dr. Kristin Neff and Self-Compassion: https://self-compassion.org/
- Join the Self-Compassion Community: https://self-compassion.org/self-compassion-community/
- Fierce Self-Compassion by Dr. Kristin Neff: https://bookshop.org/p/books/fierce-self-compassion-how-to-harness-kindness-to-speak-up-claim-your-power-and-thrive-dr-kristin-neff/76d3f59a98e08da8?ean=9780062991065&next=t
- Self-Compassion by Dr. Kristin Neff: https://bookshop.org/p/books/self-compassion-the-proven-power-of-being-kind-to-yourself-dr-kristin-neff/a22f80fa1a9efa3b?ean=9780061733529&next=t
- Managing Back to School Stress on MasterClass: http://masterclass.com/backtoschool
Continue the conversation with Dr. Alexandra Solomon:
- Ask a question! Submit your relationship challenge: https://form.jotform.com/212295995939274
- Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day: https://bookshop.org/p/books/love-every-day-365-relational-self-awareness-practices-to-help-your-relationship-heal-grow-and-thrive-alexandra-solomon/19970421?ean=9781683736530
- Cultivate connection by subscribing to Dr. Alexandra’s newsletter: https://dralexandrasolomon.com/subscribe/
- Learn more on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dr.alexandra.solomon/
For Love, In Truth: How To Live Authentically and Find Joy with Dr. Martha Beck
“The cost of that is courage, to live for love, in truth. It takes a lot of guts and the rewards are indescribable.”
Dr. Alexandra sits down with bestselling author and coach Dr. Martha Beck to explore what it means to live “for love, in truth”, a mantra that can redefine the way we experience love and relationships. In a world filled with societal pressures and expectations, Martha shares her wisdom on how embracing authenticity can unlock profound joy and lead to fulfilling connections. Martha reflects on her unconventional journey through relationships, and the life-changing lessons learned from a spiritual experience she had while under anesthesia and from being shunned by her community in her young adulthood. Together, Dr. Alexandra and Dr. Martha Beck tackle a listener's poignant question about experiencing doubt in her relationship that’s full of “emotional complexities and longing”, leading her to question if her needs are being met.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
- What Martha Beck means by her mantra, “For love, in truth,” and how to recognize when you’re living out of alignment with your truth.
- How to hold love and truth through moments of doubt and loss, and how to embrace doubt and loss as necessary aspects of growth.
- How to come back to peace when life feels overwhelming.
- How to balance compassion for your partner with holding your own truth, telling your own story, and tending to your personal needs.
Resources worth mentioning from the episode:
- Learn more about Martha Beck: https://marthabeck.com/
- Beyond Anxiety: Curiosity, Creativity and Finding Your Life’s Purpose by Martha Beck: https://bookshop.org/p/books/beyond-anxiety-curiosity-creativity-and-finding-your-life-s-purpose-martha-beck/6741d02da06f0869
- Martha Beck and Rowan Mangan’s Wilder Community: https://wildercommunity.com/
- Managing Back to School Stress on MasterClass: http://masterclass.com/backtoschool
Continue the conversation with Dr. Alexandra Solomon:
- Ask a question! Submit your relationship challenge: https://form.jotform.com/212295995939274
- Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day: https://bookshop.org/p/books/love-every-day-365-relational-self-awareness-practices-to-help-your-relationship-heal-grow-and-thrive-alexandra-solomon/19970421?ean=9781683736530
- Cultivate connection by subscribing to Dr. Alexandra’s newsletter: https://dralexandrasolomon.com/subscribe/
- Learn more on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dr.alexandra.solomon/
Living Authentically: How to Cultivate Vulnerability, Emotional Safety, and Joy with Jennifer Pastiloff
Dr. Alexandra sits down with author and speaker Jennifer Pastiloff for a heartfelt conversation centered on vulnerability, new beginnings, and embracing joy through trying times. Jen’s candid sharing of her personal journey reminds us that we're constantly given opportunities to evolve ourselves, heal, and step more deeply into our authenticity. Jen and Dr. Alexandra also discuss navigating the "messy middle" after a breakup or divorce, and how we can begin again in life after facing bumps in the road. Jen's new book, Proof of Life: Let Go, Let Love, and Stop Looking for Permission to Live Your Life, is out today and explores all of these topics and many more.
You'll come away from this episode with:
- Hope & permission to live a bigger and more beautiful life
- Reminders for how to cultivate emotional safety in your intimate partnerships, which will pave the way for deeper connection
- A deeper understanding of the importance of "I Got You" people—the supportive folks in your circle who reflect your best self back to you—and clues for how to find them
- Empowerment to feel joy and search for beauty even in the most difficult or heartbreaking chapters of your life
“Your Midyear Refresh” on MasterClass: masterclass.com/yourmidyearrefresh
Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: pesi.com/dralexandra
Proof of Life: Let Go, Let Love, and Stop Looking for Permission to Live Your Life by Jennifer Pastiloff
Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day
Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter