
It is time for a new sexual revolution. It’s time to take sexy back.
Taking Sexy Back
The very notion of sexual pleasure has long been hijacked from women. Today’s sexual climate leaves little to no space for honoring the complexities of sex—sex as pleasure, sex as connection, sex as creative expression, sex as communication, and sex as healing. This is particularly true for young women navigating today’s dating world, who need to be able to identify which sexual choices feel authentic, pleasurable, and joyful, and which ones leave them feeling “less-than.”
In Taking Sexy Back, relationship expert Alexandra Solomon—author of Loving Bravely—offers a powerful and holistic approach to help you reclaim your sexuality, communicate your desires, draw boundaries, be safe, and build the satisfying relationships you truly want. Regardless of your current relationship status, you’ll learn to cultivate your own sexual self-awareness and use that awareness to create sexual experiences that elevate, connect, expand, and heal you.
Sex is about more than what your partner enjoys or finds sexy. It’s about more than having an orgasm or finding the “right” positions. This book offers a road map to help you reclaim your sexual power. It offers time and space to think and feel, and to ask yourself the important question—what do you want?
“Psychologist Solomon (Loving Bravely) empowers and enlightens in this manual that encourages women to accept and control their sexuality… Like a wise older sister or a trusted friend, Solomon illustrates how to move from fear to love with meditations, creative writing (‘write an erotic short story’), and mental exercises (ask, ‘at which point in the day do you feel most connected to Your Sexy’). She also tackles the topic of sexual traumas and the poison they inject into relationships, and encourages experimentation and sexual fantasies as tools to learn one’s own sexuality. ‘Joyful sex rests on risk, self-compassion, and trust,” she writes. Solomon proves to be a savvy, empathetic voice in this educational and inspiring guide.”
–Publishers Weekly
“Taking Sexy Back is going directly on my top list of recommended sexuality readings. Not only did I learn a lot but I so enjoyed the ease, directness and warmth with which Solomon guides us to deeper sexual and relational self-awareness. An offer we can’t refuse!”
–Esther Perel, LMFT, New York Times bestselling author
“Instead of striving to be sexy to fulfill the desires of others, women need to explore their own sexuality, writes Solomon (psychology, Northwestern Univ.; Loving Bravely) in this deep dive into the messages most women hear about sex growing up. The author advises readers to turn the “I shoulds” to “I want” and shows women how to be mindfully present during sex and to create situations with their partners that are safe and playful. While concentrating on sexy as a state of mind, Solomon also addresses the physical and erotic components of intercourse. VERDICT A welcome read for women looking to explore more adventurous, impassioned sexual lives.”
–Library Journal
Order Now: Amazon • Barnes & Noble • IndieBound

Loving Bravely
Available Now from New Harbinger
Real love starts with you. In order to attract a life partner and build a healthy intimate relationship, you must first become a good partner to yourself. This book offers twenty invaluable lessons that will help you explore and commit to your own emotional and psychological well-being so you can be ready, resilient, and confident in love.
Many of us enter into romantic relationships full of expectation and hope, only to be sorely disappointed by the realization that the partner we’ve selected is a flawed human being with their own neuroses, history, and desires. Most relationships end because one or both people haven’t done the internal work necessary to develop self-awareness and take responsibility for their own experiences. We’ve all heard “You can’t love anyone unless you love yourself,” but amid life’s distractions and the myth of perfect, romantic love, how exactly do you do that?
In Loving Bravely, psychologist, professor and relationship expert Alexandra H. Solomon introduces the idea of relational self-awareness, encouraging you to explore your personal history to gain an understanding of your own relational patterns, as well as your strengths and weaknesses in relationships. By doing so, you’ll learn what relationships actually require, beyond the fairytale notions of romance. And by maintaining a steady but gentle focus on yourself, you’ll build the best possible foundation for making a loving connection.
By understanding your past relationship experiences, cultivating a strong sense of self-awareness, and determining what it is you really want in a romantic partner—you’ll be ready to find the healthy, lasting love your heart desires.
—Ian Kerner, PhD LMFT, New York Times best-selling author
—Publishers Weekly
—Shefali Tsabary, PhD, New York Times bestselling author
Order Now: Amazon • Barnes & Noble • IndieBound
Join the private Facebook group Book Club
When you apply for membership, be sure to have:
- Proof of purchase for Loving Bravely
- The email address associated with your Facebook account